Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Go Directly to Adulthood. Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect $200.

     At some point along the way, I became an adult.  By adult, I don't mean that I became 18 or 21 or whatever the appropriate age is to be officially declared "adult".  No, I'm talking about the "responsible" one in the room full of kids, the one that worries about getting home at a reasonable time, so I don't ache all over the next morning, the one that religiously puts lotion on her hands at night because hey, I'm not getting any younger and one of these days, those wrinkles are going to fight back, the one that is labeled "chaperone" in a group of high schoolers, that's the "adult" I'm talking about.  I didn't even see it coming either, it just snuck up on me and hit me in the back of the head like a big 2x4... SMACK!  I declare you an adult!  (Cue the gasps and shrieks of horror).

     I may or may not have mentioned before that my husband, Brad, leads high school worship at our church on Wednesday nights.  We always go early because he has sound check and "rehearsal" (rehearsal meaning he tunes his guitar and the high school kids that are supposed to make up the band and are supposed to be running through the songs with him flit around the room like hummingbirds from group to group gossiping, giggling, and in general making a big to do about some drama that really isn't a drama at all, but rather some meaningless nonsense such as OMG, Becky and Kelly wore the same dress to Johnny's party and it was like, sooooo embarrassing!).  Tonight, Morgan and I decided to go with him and hang out for a bit before dropping Morgan in the nursery and heading off to choir rehearsal myself.  Let me preface this next part by saying that I do realize that I'm now officially a mom and I am working on coming to terms with that.  I was aware that was going to happen and I had 9 months to prepare for it, but nobody tells you about the adult thing.  Nobody gives you any kind of countdown like oh, by the way, you've got 3 years, 6 months, and 8 days til you're an adult... have fun while you can!  No, no, it just dawns on you one day.  That day was today for me.

     I was sitting there, or rather I was running all over the room chasing Morgan and keeping her from pulling an amp down on herself or impaling herself with a mic stand or some other such tragedy, when I took a quick stock of the high school students in the room.  These kids were about 15, 16, maybe 17 and the biggest concern for them was some test that was coming up and the fact that they were apparently going to have to survive on Taco Bell when they got to college because they all assumed they would be broke, which really upset one guy in particular who had a sworn vengeance against Taco Bell.  No big deal.  I can remember when my biggest problem was wondering if the guy I had a crush on at the time knew I was staring at him in class or not.  But then, my traitorous brain played a trick on me and had me do some quick math... When were these kids born?  Oh... my... gosh... these kids, the ones that I thought I was not that far off from, were BORN when I was already in HIGH SCHOOL!  I was DRIVING when these kids were in DIAPERS!  SMACK!  I declare you an adult!  Oh Lord... somebody bring me some Motrin... and an Icy Hot Patch... and a cup of Earl Grey while you're at it.  I was not prepared for this!  Not only that, but I'm also a good bit older than the high school PASTOR!  Yep, I can no longer fake it anymore.  I can't be the "just out of college" person anymore, I can't be the "I'm older than you, but I'm not too old to still hang out with you" person, I can't even be the "yeah, I'm out of school, but I still act like a kid, so I'm cool" person anymore.  Nope, I'm an adult now.

     BUT, I'm an adult that still enjoys singing at the top of my lungs to a song in the car, that still freaks out when Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes make their appearance in the grocery stores each year, that still likes to get all dressed up and pretend I'm going to prom when my husband takes me out somewhere fancy, that still loves rolling in the grass and watching the clouds, that gets all giddy inside when the mall puts up their Christmas decorations and when Christmas morning finally arrives... yep, I'm an adult who still enjoys the kid side of life and I'm okay with that!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Yes, Tears ARE Sexy!

     I saw my husband cry for the first time tonight... and it was the sexiest thing I've ever seen.

     Brad and I have been together for almost 10 years and in all those years, I've never seen him cry, ever.  Not when we got married, not when I was in the hospital, not when he lost his job, not when I told him I was pregnant, not when Morgan was born... never... although he did get a little misty-eyed one time over a sports montage set to Five For Fighting's Chances Are.

     Brad leads the high school worship at our church on Wednesday nights.  Tonight, the high school pastor showed a video after his message about Job.  This video just happened to precede Brad's last song, which was to be a moving solo on his acoustic guitar.  Now, I wasn't there to actually witness this, but he says that he was so teary-eyed that he could barely do the song!  Knowing my husband the way I do, I took that to mean, okay, so he was moved a little by this video, which means he probably just had to clear his throat a little before singing because my husband just does not cry... period.  Well, after we got home, he showed me this video and I'm not going to lie, I was in tears, and I don't cry easily at stuff... except for the shelter animals commercial with Sarah McClachlan singing Angel.  That one tears me up every time!  In the midst of my blubbering, I looked over to see his reaction and there were tears in MY husband's eyes, actual tears!  This man that I've known for almost a decade without a single tear in those 10 years, this man that watches more sports than the number of Brett Favre's retirement announcements, this man that displays so much testosterone that part of me wonders if he might could actually lift a car if he was of mind to, was tearing up over a video about a baby.  Some might ask, "what kind of man does that?!" and I would have to answer proudly, "MY man does that!"  Any guys out there that might be reading this blog, take a woman's advice:  nothing attracts women more than a guy that can get emotional over something he's passionate about or that he cares about deeply... nothing.  My amazing husband was seeing our own child mirrored in this baby and it warmed my heart so much to see how much he truly, deeply cares for our child.  It was like that scene in How the Grinch Stole Christmas when the Grinch's heart swells up and breaks that little x-ray device.  My heart was swelling with admiration for what a wonderful, caring father my husband is and THAT puts all of those shirtless Abercrombie models to shame.  Girls?  Can I get a "heck yeah"?

By the way. here's the video.  Watch it with a box of tissues.
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